Sometimes I assume people just *know* what’s going on in my convoluted little brain. I think that just because I’m used to something or because I’ve told a story a million times, everyone must know it too. For instance, I learned recently that Teara’s friend Pam, (also my friend but in the sister realm you…

I was talking to my Biff the other day and she told me about some bitch in her life that makes a big deal over really stupid things as if she were still in high school. I said it sounds like she has a good ol’ case of arrested development (the psychology, not the TV…

Lisa: Oh my God. Look at that! Mom, I should’ve brought the coral shoes. You said I was taking too much. Marjorie: Well, sweetheart, you brought ten pairs. Lisa: But the coral shoes matched that dress. Baby: This is not a tragedy. A tragedy is three men trapped in a mine or police dogs used…

Step 1 – Write a post on a social media platform. Step 2 – Start with an apology for your need to post. Step 3 – State the number of years you’ve done all the hard work. Step 4 – Briefly include that others have helped you but don’t mention their names (after all, this…

I am very well-aware that I’m going to offend someone with this post but I’m sorry, this has to be said. Here’s a little story: Last night, on September 30th there was a commercial for “holiday scents”. I don’t even know what it was for because I wasn’t paying attention, but then PJ exclaims, “Holiday…

Ahhhhhh Halloween. Every year Teara and I begged Lol to let us wear our Wonder Woman and Batgirl Underoos as costumes. Every year she said “No.” “What if we wore them OVER our clothes?” “No.” “Pleassssseeeee????!!!!” “No.” Instead she’d take us to Toys ‘R’ Us and we’d pick out our boxed superhero costumes. You know,…

When I was 14 I signed up for a town program that gave kids working papers. I didn’t really want to work because I was lazy as shit. While everyone else played a sport or was in a club, you could find me on my couch eating and watching General Hospital, then Oprah, then falling…

There are many buzzwords and catchphrases I dislike, but the king of them all is: Does that make sense? I’ve yet to hear someone ask it after they’ve stated something that is particularly complicated. I truly think people use it as a condescending way to make sure you’re paying attention to them. Or maybe they…

I’m about to give you one of the most valuable pieces of advice you may never have known you needed, so listen up. One night not too long ago, my sons were afraid to go to sleep because they stumbled upon a clip for the movie IT and watched it. I tried to be gentle:…

When I find a good hack, I love to share. When I share a good hack that helps other people who hate cooking as much as I do, well, I feel like I just gained my angel wings. So here it goes. What’s better than Thanksgiving? Nothing. Don’t even try to fight me on this…

One of my very favorite movie lines is from John Travolta in Saturday Night Fever: Would ya just watch the hair? Ya know, I spend a long time on my hair and he hit it; he hit my hair. This was Travolta’s character, Tony, talking about how his Dad smacked him in the head. He…

Can we all put politics aside and address an equally large problem? STOP TOUCHING PEOPLE YOU SHOULDN’T BE TOUCHING!!!!!!!!! I never liked Cuomo. I thought it was embarrassing that he and his brother made a mockery of getting a COVID test by going on CNN with giant q-tips and making fun of each other’s noses.…

Amy Winehouse 🖤 sang one of my favorite songs “Back to Black”. In her case she was singing about drinking and drugs, but I can relate to it on this level: Riding high one day and then depression and/or self-hatred, and/or major anxiety shows up out of nowhere and makes itself comfortable in my head.…

re·li·gion/rəˈlijən/Learn to pronouncenoun the belief in and worship of a superhuman controlling power, especially a personal God or gods. Emphasis on the “personal”, please. I’ve written a bunch of times about my exploration into religion. Luckily I think I’ve found it, but it’s not in the Bible. Let me rephrase that. It’s not in someone…

Teara took piano lessons when we were kids, so naturally, I wanted to take piano lessons too. My parents bought a piano and put it in our living room. It was a light brown upright with a black leather bench seat that flipped up so we could store music sheets in it. I don’t know…

I can’t believe the ad I just saw for Victoria’s Secret. After a million years of giving men ridiculous expectations that women should be hairless, Amazonian sex goddesses, and giving women body dysmorphic issues and eating disorders, they have finally come to the realization that no one wants their itchy-ass underwear. This wasn’t always the…

I was a bitch in school. Most of the girls were. Bitchy little girls that went along with their peers and did horrible things. I was the type who went along with things, but by no means was I innocent. I was worse, a pathetic little follower doing what I thought I should do to…

PJ’s cultural background is 1/2 Italian, 1/4 Japanese, 1/4 Puerto Rican, and a drop of Hungarian Jewish ancestry thrown in to make him a real mensch. My background is 1/2 Italian and 1/2 Irish, with enough American Indian thrown in to make me a true American native compared to the racists whose families immigrated here…

I got the largest capacity washing machine on the market because laundry takes up 98.8% of my life. That 1.2% of my life is me putting half my body into the washing machine to retrieve the wet clothes at the bottom to transfer into the dryer – all while getting a little step aerobics in…

After having my second son, PJ and I decided to stop at two. I always saw myself with three kids, but reluctantly agreed with the rest of the world when they said things like: Having three kids is too expensive. The world is built for families of four. Three kids are way too much work.…

I’m pretty confident in myself now. Growing up I’d always heard that women hit their stride in their 40s because they start feeling more comfortable in their skin. I didn’t realize at the time that it was just a nice way of saying that by 40 you get to a point where you don’t give…

Please, I beg you … unless you’re in the 1%, stop saying people shouldn’t be paid the living wage. Do you even know what a living wage is? Here’s the definition: The living wage is the amount of income determined to provide a decent standard of living. It should pay for the cost of living…

If I want something I get it. I’m not talking about earning money to buy the things that I want, I’m talking about when I want something – and not monetarily – I find a way to get it. Never dishonestly. Never going against my morals. I figure out a way that sooner or later…

I’m getting further into my Bible journey, and those who think I’m about to join a cult, rest assured that I’m still the same skeptical person I’ve always been. So we’re up to David & Goliath. Trust that I love the story of David & Goliath because at 5 ft. nothing, I face giant bullies…

A lot of people think immaturity at 44 is a bad thing, but my 8 & 10 year olds asked me last night why I like the cartoon Clarence so much. I said, “Because it’s a sweet, funny, all-inclusive cartoon about a kid who comes from a non-“traditional” family and is friends with people of…

Let’s go back to when things were easier… When we pledged our allegiance to one nation, under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all. When things were true and real. When everyone worshipped one God, my God. When everyone had a fair shake at justice. You remember, right? Back when it was easier. When…

On April 29th PJ & I will be married for 15 years. A lot of marriages end in divorce because in the beginning it’s new and exciting and you’re 2 crazy kids that do wild things together. Then after a certain amount of time, the newness fades away, you settle into married life, have some…

I love Taylor Swift. Her songs are so good and always have been, but I really began to respect her when she wrote Shake It Off. Why? Because the players really are always gonna play play play… And the haters are always gonna hate hate hate… And she just keeps… 🎶 cruisin’… can’t stop won’t…

I pride myself on making things as uncomplicated as possible. I’ve written many times in this blog: Go the easy route!Try this life-saving hack! Don’t put more stress on yourself than necessary! To practice what I preach, when I’m invited to someone’s house, my go-to is a store-bought delicacy, or maybe some wine. Easy-peasy-lemon-squeezy. Then…

A million years ago when PJ and I got together the 2nd time – the “for real this time” time, he and his friends lived in Huntington, LI. I loved Huntington. Gorgeous old houses; you could walk to town in 5 minutes or less; everyone seemed to know each other. But alas, we could not…