As I’m about to send my first-born off to college, the weight of what it is to be a parent has been hitting hard.

I believe in God.

I believe He serves us lessons. Not always obvious ones, but if you look closely, they’re there.

Like right now, there’s a bird’s nest in the wreath on my front door.

Ever since we’ve moved into this house, a new bird couple builds a nest each spring.

I’m lucky enough to have my own bird’s-eye view of the nest from the second floor of my house. This year (this is where God comes in) I’ve been able to witness almost every step of the making of this family, where normally I’ve only gotten bits and pieces.

I’ve seen momma bird diligently sitting on her eggs for hours on end.

One day I looked down and momma was gone; pink, squirmy babies were in place of the eggs.

Then I’d get to see momma or daddy swoop down and methodically deposit food into each bird’s hungry, screaming, wide-open beak. (Always my favorite part.)

Once they’re fed, momma would sit back down and keep her babies warm.

Over the past month, the birdies have grown so much. They’ve gone from pink-skinned, to fuzzy puffballs, to grey-feathered.

Lately they’ve been restless and have started to flap their wings. They climb all over each other and eventually settle back down.

The other day I was watering my flowers and found one of the babies caught frozen in a plant. I think it got too confident trying to fly and fell out of the nest. It must have been so scared trying to get back home but couldn’t. I buried the sweet thing under my favorite tree and said a prayer.

The others are still in the nest but will surely fly away soon. The poor mother. She sits up so high on top now, struggling to keep her babies safe underneath.

There’s bird poop all around the nest now and it’s begun to block my little view into their world.

Soon they’ll all be gone.

Good writers don’t hit you over the head with what they’re trying to say, but I feel the need to walk you through my lesson.

As parents, like the bird couple, things start out fresh and new with so much hope. Then it’s your job to love and care for your babies. The teenage years come along and they get restless. Your children give you tons of shit and sometimes make your life uncomfortable. Terrible things may happen along the way but you have to keep your trust in God. You keep teaching & listening, and you keep loving. Their entire childhood goes by and it feels like it’s only been a month – then they’re off into the world. You’re sad but at the same time, happy for them – hoping that you did a good job. No matter how hard you try to hold on, it’s only natural to let them go.

So I have to… I have to be happy instead of wallowing.

This is life. This beautiful, heartbreaking life.