About a year ago, rumors swirled that Red Lobster was going out of business. Sadly, the rumors were true – they were filing for Chapter 11.

But not all heroes wear capes – some wear giant alarm clocks around their necks and gold grills on their teeth.

Flavor Flav swooped in screaming Yeah boyeeee and saved the day.

From what I read, I can’t tell if he invested in the seafood chain or if he just hyped it up, but I’m so glad he did!!

Not only is the food unmatched (mention cheddar bay biscuits and I go Pavlovian) but I have SO many great memories that took place in a Red Lobster.

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It was at Red Lobster that I was having a lovely meal with my family; I’m not sure what raised my little sister bitch hackles to Teara, but I felt it absolutely necessary to tell my parents that she got a tattoo. She was so mad. I thought it was funny. My parents started to get upset. Teara said, “It’s a daisy on my thigh. I’ve had it for over a year and you never even knew. You’re such an asshole TIFFANY.”

Or something to that effect.

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As a matter of fact, this isn’t the first time Red Lobster almost went out of business. The first time was when they had all-you-can~eat crab legs and Pa accepted the challenge. If Lol didn’t stop him, we’d still be there watching him eat crab legs. We actually saw wait staff peering around the wall at us. First to see if he was sharing (which you’re not allowed to do at all-you-can-eat crab legs, Trust me, he wasn’t); then we think it was because they were in sheer awe of this man. If competitive eating was as a thing back then, he’d put Joey Chestnut to shame. You’d think he would weigh 1,000 lbs the way my dad could pack it away, but he doesn’t.

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At my first real job on Long Island, I still lived at home, so I was able to waste my paycheck on big lunches everyday at places like Friendly’s, Kikku of Empire, the diner, and of course, Red Lobster, which we christened The Lob, and I’ve been calling it that ever since. I don’t know how I ever went back to work after The Lob without having a George Costanza-style desk so I could take a nap.

I had some of the biggest laughs of my life at those lunches with my two friends. It was over 20 years ago and I still clearly remember sitting in The Lob lobby in front of the lobster tank discussing how the poor creatures had no idea that they were about to meet their demise. We would worry that we weren’t being seated quickly enough and would exceed our lunch hour – which we always did but still couldn’t resist going there. Then I would chat up the hostess, and once we were seated, my friends would make fun of me because they said I had a thing for old people.

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It was at The Lob where I bonded with my Biff by confiding some of our biggest secrets. What an honor it is to be trusted, isn’t it? An Admiral’s Feast and the confidence of a true friend? What could be better?

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PJ asked where I wanted to go for my birthday this weekend. We usually ditch the kids for a romantic dinner somewhere, but this year, I’m in the mood for us to all be together; to laugh and stuff our faces with fried shrimp, lobster tails, and of course Cheddar Bay Biscuits. Thank you Flavor Flav for making it possible! 🦞♥️

*side note: back in the day, Danielle and I met Flavor Flav outside a Latin dance club on Long Island. He was just as friendly and awesome as he seems. Hugs and laughs all around ⏰♥️