I’m waiting in line at Homegoods. I’ve been waiting for 20 minutes now. It’s fine. I have my phone. I’m annoying PJ via text.

But. There is the most annoying mother fucker behind me.

Some days I’m in the mood to chat. Some days I’m not. Respect that.

Nope. Not this guy. Twenty minutes ago I made it clear that I didn’t want to indulge his need for pointless banter by giving a slight smile and then keeping my back to him.

He’s proceeded to sing, talk loudly on his phone, “accidentally” bump my heel with his cart, and now he’s obnoxiously, out of rhythm, drumming – but more like banging – on his cart.

What a selfish baby.

And no, he’s not trying to flirt with me. He’s probably 80 years old.

And no, he’s not lonely. I heard him call someone and he screamed so the whole store could hear him talk about all his visiting plans for the day.

He just coughed on me.

Amazon…I love you so ♥️