Sometimes I’m a mystery to myself. As I’ve mentioned many, many times before, I do not like to cook. However, my favorite thing to do is watch cooking shows.

There has to be some hidden psychology going on there. It’s not like I think one day I’ll see something that looks so good that I’ll jump up from my couch and actually make it, because everything always looks good and the thought never crossed my mind.

If it is psychological, it’s most likely because I grew up around women who cooked for their families and seeing it on TV brings me comfort. It’s 100% how my mother shows her love for us. The pandemic has been the hardest for her because she can’t have us all gathered around her table where she stuffs us silly then sends us off with plates of leftovers.

We went to Charlotte Motor Speedway the other night so she could get her first round of the Covid vaccine. It felt surreal circling the track where each checkpoint was laid out strategically – far enough apart so that cars didn’t bottleneck at the end where you’d ultimately get the shot.

There were hundreds of people working together to make the effort go off without a hitch. We stayed warm in the car and rolled down the window at each checkpoint so paperwork could be looked at and questions could be asked.

There’s no doubt the night air would have turned their breath into billowy clouds of grey smoke had it not been for their masks – but if they were cold or tired you’d never know it. Every single person was so nice that I was actually waiting for at least one person to seem even remotely put out. It never happened.

I believe it’s because these SAINTS have been working so damn hard this past year and have seen too much. I think they are genuinely thrilled that people are willing to do their part and get the vaccine.

I had an e-visit with my own doctor the other day. I wanted to hug her through the screen because she looked so tired. I didn’t tell her that though because my perpetually sleepy-looking and darkly-circled eyes have had people telling me my whole life how tired I look. It’s not exactly a compliment even though I know it’s not meant to be an insult. I should probably wear more makeup but I’m too lazy. I digress.

My friend Kayon, an RN, has been traveling to different states to help care for patients, and is now helping to administer the vaccine.

Do you know how many people I want to punch in the face on Kayon’s behalf when I see them carelessly and recklessly treating this pandemic like it’s no big deal – or worse – like it’s a farce? A lot. I want to punch a lot of people in the face.

I know too many people who have died because of it. And that 99% survival rate you keep hearing about? I personally know of 2 people going through rehab to learn how to live again. Consider that when you talk about the survival rate.

Back to my mom. She keeps saying she can’t wait to hug her boys again. It’s funny because she’s never been much of a hugger. Her version of a hug is usually shaped in a ball of meat, drenched in sauce and placed atop a large pile of spaghetti – but I think almost a year of not being allowed to make physical contact may have turned her into a real hugger.

If you’re on the fence about getting the vaccine and/or don’t really think the pandemic is a problem, please, I beg you to get it if you can.

Wait, hold on, I was trying to be nice because I’m trying to turn over a new leaf, but in this case I cannot, so …

Get the fucking vaccine if you can and stop being a stupid fucking selfish asshole.

Ahh that felt good.