You go on a dinner date for your husband’s birthday. Your wonderful sister offers to have your boys sleep over so you can have a nice quiet evening and sleep in the next day. After a perfect dinner and dazzling conversation, you go back to your house and:

A. Watch the movie Joker and fall asleep on the couch.

B. As Jerry Seinfeld says, “yada yada yada”

C. A storm comes through, the new trampoline Santa got the kids for Christmas gets launched like Dorothy Gale’s house into the green space across from your house and gets caught on a bench and bushes. Now you have to pray to the Lord that you don’t get struck by lightening as you and your husband lift and pull the giant monstrosity back to the house while also praying that your ultimate demise isn’t by electrocution because of the lightening-rod of a dog waste station that you’ve been fighting to have placed anywhere other than in front of your house for the past several months. Then you have to pull both cars out of the garage because the storm is so bad that you have to put the (now mangled) trampoline in your garage. After experiencing exactly how Marky Mark felt while filming The Perfect Storm, you go back inside and as you’re admiring how torrential rain and damaging winds actually put a really nice curl in your hair, you get a text from your middle child asking you to pick him up because the storm is making him nervous. Then your youngest wants to come home too. So your husband goes to pick them up as you change out of your wet “sexy” pajamas (sexy meaning the only t-shirt you own without a hole in it) into dry, homeless-looking pajamas, knowing that your morning will now consist of being woken up early by your son begging for pancakes.

If you guessed A & B you win a prize. Congradufuckinlations 🎉

Edit: it’s A & C! I wish there was yada yada yada 😂